Today was a very hard day. This morning with my father was hard and then we all (all six of us packed into a minivan with a wheelchair and a walker to boot) went to an open house for an assisted living place. Afterwards we went to lunch as it just seemed too cruel to do that and then leave my parents at home by themselves.
Very, very hard day. There were some amusing moments of course which I should be able to recount later. Right now I just feel exhausted and sad. Why on earth must aging be so undignified?
Today after church some man insisted on carrying my father’s coffee. O.K., so he was slopping it a bit—but I had asked him and he said he wanted to carry it. And sometimes when my father tries to hold the door for someone they don’t let him—-damn it–he’s still a man. Let him be a man. I hate it when sometimes at the grocery store or at church someone smiles at us the same way they might smile if I were with Owen or Leo. He’s a man not a child.
Today was a very hard day.