Last night around 3 a.m. a voice wafted across the hallway calling for Mom.  I sleepily said, "what Owen?" and he wanted to know if it was morning because he wanted to bring me a present.  We convinced him it was the middle of the night and we all went back to sleep (after he’d crawled into bed with us of course).  So this morning as I was trying to pull myself out of bed and into the shower he popped awake and told me to stay right there.  A few minutes later he trotted back into the room with a glass of my coffee-milk and a bowl of cornflakes.  "This is my present for you Mom," he announced.  "I did this for you because you do nice things for us"  Then he kissed me and told me that I should always kiss Daddy like that and not do the movie kind of kiss where you turn your head back and forth (I swear I don’t know what he’s been watching) because he and  Leo wouldn’t like that.  I love my sweet pea.  Mornings like this make up for his incredible skill for being LOUD and whiny at the same time…..

Last night the boys came to see the cherry blossoms at Japan House.  It’s funny—in some ways I would think Owen would be the one that would like flowers but it’s Leo that I think will be my gardener.  He was very impressed and then of course they just galloped around the arboretum…

When we got home Leo announced he had to make a poster about penguins for the science fair.  So he went upstairs to the computer and printed out a few sentences about penguins and then I printed out a couple of pictures of penguins.  I was picturing poster board and cutting things out, etc., etc…..  Leo merely taped the pages together and said his poster was done.  This was one of those times where it was really hard to hold back and not start telling him how we should do it.  I, of course, want him to have a brilliant and beautifully designed penguin poster at the science fair.  "THIS IS NOT ABOUT YOU" I told myself.  "IT’S HIS POSTER"  sigh.  It can be so hard to hold back sometimes.  The other day a couple of neighborhood kids came over to play with the boys and I was itching to get bossy and involved.  I didn’t really like how they were treating the boys but I know that unless there’s a problem or the boys say something to me that I just have to let them be.  ARGH it is hard sometimes.  It also made me think about some of my biases.  I don’t like admitting to bias but of course I have some as we all do.  I hear these kids saying ‘ain’t’ and using rougher language and I start to bristle.  But then of course my children have shaggy hair and run around without shirts or shoes 8 months out of the year.  Sometimes I watch them playing with nicely dressed children wearing bike helmets and clothes and I think "good lord, what do other parents think of me? My children look like little hillbillies"  Man this parenting stuff makes you learn things about yourself.  I have learned so much about myself—-good and bad—since I’ve had the guys.  Surely therapy would be easier and cheaper…..