Had a good talk with Judi last night.  We talked a little about the fear of cancers returning.  She said her greatest fear is not being around to see the boys grow up.  You have no idea blog, how much she adores those boys…and how they adore her in return. The boys were happy to hear about her most recent scans.  Leo delightedly talks on the phone to her.  Owen doesn’t talk to her on the phone these days which is very out of character for him.  I worry about those boys.  They will get to see her this summer which will be good.

Of course my greatest fear is having the boys lose Ernie.  Although being happy and whole without Ernie is unfathomable to me, I know that I would survive.  But the boys….they must have Ernie.

I told her that one of my fears is that I will wake up and she will be gone and Ernie will be gone…..but then I said, "and you know….Mom and Dad will probably STILL be alive."  We laughed and laughed.  You have to laugh through your fears….otherwise they would consume you.

Thoughts?