A quiet weekend again. I've been reading up on vestibular disorders, as we seem to have finally narrowed it down to that regarding the issues that are really bothering me at the moment. I read the list of symptoms (I've copied some below) and it felt like, "bam, bam, bam….yes, yes, yes." It is comforting to know I'm not crazy. It is so lonely to feel symptoms and not be able to make sense of it. Hell, I know I'm repeating myself. I said that in the last blog post. This has just been a little…mmmm….pick your adjective….and I find this comforting.
Last night I slept twelve hours, although some of it was restless, with all sorts of strange stress dreams (although you'll be glad to know that Anthony Bourdain really liked me when he met me in one of my lengthy dreams). I went to bed before dark…always a sign that you really need the sleep. I didn't even stay awake long enough to talk to Owen after his shift at Black Dog. Hattie and I curled up and I attempted to read, gave up, and played, as I do so many nights, some Aaron Lee Tasjan. This morning I am medicated up for the dizziness and headaches and so am spacey. I tried to read but it's hard to focus. Oh, and first I downloaded a book from the library and realize I had read it recently; I went and downloaded a second one…same thing. Third time was a charm…but I'm not holding out for comprehension and retention!
Last night's dinner was a victory….about ten minutes to make, simple, and delicious. Smoke pork chops from the U of I Meat Lab, just browned in a cast iron skillet for a few minutes, mashed sweet potato with a bit of lime and hot sauce, and sliced cucumbers. Simple really is best often as not.
And as always, Rascal continues to watch over us all.
VESTIBULAR DISORDER SYMPTOMS
VERTIGO AND DIZZINESS
• Spinning or whirling sensation; a feeling the person or world moving when it is not (vertigo)
• Symptoms can be present while sitting still, in specific positions, or with movement
• Lightheaded, floating, or rocking sensation (dizziness)
BALANCE AND SPATIAL ORIENTATION
• Imbalance, stumbling, difficulty walking straight or when turning
• Clumsiness or difficulty with coordination
• Tendency to touch or hold onto something when standing, or to touch or hold the head while seated
• Trouble focusing or tracking objects with the eyes; objects or words on a page seem to jump, bounce, float, or blur or may appear doubled
• Sensitivity to light, glare, and moving or flickering lights; fluorescent lights may be especially troublesome
• Sensitivity to certain types of computer monitors and digital televisions
• Hearing loss; distorted or fluctuating hearing
• Tinnitus (ringing, roaring, buzzing, whooshing, or other noises in the ear)
• Difficulty concentrating and paying attention; easily distracted
• Forgetfulness and short-term memory lapses
• Confusion, disorientation, difficulty comprehending directions or instructions
• Difficulty understanding conversations, especially when there is background noise or movement
• Loss of self-reliance, self-confidence, self-esteem
• Anxiety, panic, social isolation